Face-planting in the Mashed Potatoes(A McRoll in the REAL World story)
by sammy1026
Summary: Steve and Catherine order holiday decorations and Danny has some exciting news.


_Mari & Ilna-I'm running out of superlatives to describe the two of you. You're truly the best of the best._

 _Sandy-I don't know how I could possibly survive fandom without you_

 _REAL Worlders-I can't thank you enough for all your enthusiastic support and encouragement. You guys are awesome. I apologize AGAIN for being so embarrassingly behind on replying to reviews but please know each and every one is read and appreciated. THANK YOU!_

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 **Face-planting in the Mashed Potatoes (1/1)**

 **Five-0 Headquarters**

 **Breakroom**

 **Friday 8:30 A.M.**

"Why does that witch look so happy?" Steve asked as he glanced over Catherine's shoulder as she scrolled through a selection of Halloween decorations on her tablet. "And for that matter why is that ghost laughing?"

"I thought Halloween decorations were supposed to be scary," Chin added from his seat across the table in the breakroom.

"These are kid friendly," Catherine explained patiently. "Joanie, Jacob and Kaitlyn aren't ready for any super scary decorations. We want them to have fun. We don't want to give them nightmares."

"So no severed heads covered in fake blood or life-size zombie statues is what you're saying," Steve smirked.

"That's what I'm saying," Catherine grinned at him.

"Look at these great outdoor lanterns." She pointed to the brightly-colored purple, white and orange paper lanterns adorned with pictures of a smiling skeleton, a happy jack-o-lantern and a laughing spider.

"Those would actually look pretty good hanging on the deck," he agreed. "Get some of those."

Catherine turned the tablet towards Chin just as Kono grabbed a cup of coffee and slid into the chair beside her cousin.

"Cute," they both agreed.

"What's with all the decorations," Kono asked as she added a pack of sugar to her coffee and stirred. "You guys planning a Halloween party?"

"Not a party exactly," Steve shrugged, "But Joanie and Mary are coming for a few days and I'm sure the Allen kids will be over and we just thought it would be nice if the house was decorated, you know?"

Kono nodded. "I know what you mean," she smiled softly.

She couldn't help but think that for a man who appeared to fight against settling down for so long Steve was certainly fully embracing the concept now. She wondered how much longer it would be before he and Catherine made it official.

"We're actually ordering stuff for all the holidays," he said without taking his eyes off the screen.

Chin and Kono glanced at each other knowingly. "That sounds nice."

"Wait … go back … what were those?" Steve asked as Catherine continued to scroll.

She moved back up the page and saw immediately what had caught his eye. "They're singing bats."

"We need to get a few of those for Gracie."

"We absolutely do." Catherine added them to the cart.

"Need to get a few of what for Gracie," Danny asked as he entered the room.

"Singing bats," Steve replied matter-of-factly. "We're ordering decorations for the holidays."

Danny poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down. "Singing … ok I don't know why but I have to ask … what song do they sing?"

"Monster Mash," Catherine answered as she moved to the page showing all manner of fake spider webs.

"Ok … why would they … you know what? Never mind. Let's put the issue of your holiday decorating aside for a minute. Guess what?" Danny's eyes twinkled with excitement.

"What?" the others asked in unison.

"Nonna is, as we speak," Danny paused for dramatic effect, "standing in line waiting to see the Pope in Central Park."

"Are you serious?" Catherine put her tablet on the table in front of her and clapped delightedly.

"How did that happen?" Steve asked.

"Her neighbor Sylvia's son won four tickets in some kind of drawing so he and his wife are taking Nonna and Sylvia. It all happened pretty last minute."

"That's awesome," Chin smiled. "I bet she's excited."

"Too put it mildly," Danny snorted.

Concern crept into Steve's voice. "Isn't that gonna be a lot of standing and a long wait in line though?"

"Don't worry. Everything is covered," Danny assured him. "I've met Sylvia's son and he's a great guy. I'm sure he and his wife are prepared."

"First Tony Bennet, now the Pope," Kono pointed out. "Nonna is livin' the life, isn't she?"

As if on cue Danny's phone chimed with an incoming text. He tapped the screen.

Under the subject line 'Making new friends' was a picture of a beaming Nonna flanked by her neighbor Sylvia and about a dozen other people. He turned the phone to show the others.

"That's Nonna," Steve grinned. "Never met a stranger."

Catherine leaned in to get a better look at the picture. "She's probably just sorry she can't feed them all."

"If she could, she would." Danny was absolutely positive of that. "Hey speaking on Nonna's food … "

"Yes," Chin said eagerly.

"My sisters are planning a Christmas cruise to the Caribbean … though why anyone would want to I have no idea. They've been talking about it for years like it's some can't miss bucket list type thing. They've even had tentative plans a few times before but something always came up and they had to cancel. One year they thought everything was a go then Francesca and Eric both got chicken pox. Luckily they listened to me and bought trip insurance. So this year everyone's schedule is clear and they want to do it before the kids graduate and it gets tougher to get everyone together."

"You're going on a cruise," Chin asked dubiously.

"Not me," Danny held up his hands. "Are you kidding? I have no desire to be trapped on a boat … "

"Ship," Steve and Catherine interrupted in unison.

"Fine," Danny huffed. "A ship … with thousands of strangers … unlimited amounts of food … lots of liquor and way too much … forced frivolity."

Steve bit back a smile. "Forced frivolity?"

"Yes, Steven." Danny crossed his arms over his chest. "I like the alliteration."

"If you say so," Steve smirked.

"Grace and I couldn't go anyway because she spends time with Rachel either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. But the point I was trying to get to before this conversation … as so many do with you people … went off track … is that if the trip actually happens this year I invited Nonna to come here to Hawaii for the holiday."

"Really?" All four heads snapped towards Danny.

"Really," he said.

"Nonna is coming here to Hawaii for Christmas?" Catherine practically squealed with glee. "She doesn't want to go on the cruise?"

"She really doesn't," Danny said. "She's not a big fan. So as long as the cruise goes off as planned Nonna will be coming here for the holiday."

"That is awesome." Steve's face radiated happiness and excitement.

"I can't wait to see her again," Chin said and Kono nodded in agreement.

Catherine looked at Danny as if she was just remembering something. "When we talked the other night she said she might have a big surprise but she didn't want to jinx anything. I wonder if that's what she was talking about."

"Huh," Danny squinted his eyes thoughtfully. "I may have neglected to ask if this was supposed to be a secret."

The others chuckled.

"Just in case," Danny tilted his head. "Act surprised when she tells you."

"Deal," Steve and Catherine promised.

"Let's get back to ordering decorations and pretend I never said anything. I can't wait to see the McGarrett Rollins home decked out in all its holiday regalia and finery."

"Seriously, did someone buy you a word of the day calendar?" Steve asked.

"I've been helping Grace with her homework," Danny admitted. "She gets extra points for using words in sentences. It's rubbing off on me."

Steve gave a nod of understanding. "All I can say is if you think the singing bats are strange you should have seen some of the Thanksgiving decorations we found. Who could ever possibly need a nine foot blow up pilgrim?"

"Nine feet? You're exaggerating, right?" Chin looked skeptical.

"I wish I was." Steve shook his head ruefully. "There was also a cornucopia that plays music every time you walk past it."

"There was definitely plenty of tacky stuff," Catherine said, "but we found a bunch of nice things too. With everyone coming for Thanksgiving again this year," she looked at Danny, Chin and Kono in turn and each nodded affirmatively, "plus the Allens, and Mary's new boyfriend … we want everything to look nice."

"It will," Steve assured her as he reached over and squeezed her hand. He turned back to the others. "She wouldn't let me order the animatronic turkey centerpiece. You squeeze his wing and he stands up and walks. It was hysterical."

"You're no fun, Catherine," Chin teased and Kono rolled her eyes.

"It's all fun and games," Catherine insisted, "Until it face-plants into the mashed potatoes."

"Now THAT would be funny," Chin said.

"I'll have my phone ready to take a picture just in case," Kono added.

"You gotta admit … it'd make a good story," Danny agreed.

Catherine was adamant. "There will be no walking turkey on the table."

"I guess we'll just have to find our excitement somewhere else." Steve waggled his eyebrows.

"And on that note," Danny stood up, "Before we venture into TMI territory, let's get to work."

 **THE END**

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agreed


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